I missed the first of the Twilight Vampire movies called “Twilight.”
I saw the second (“New Moon”)and found it funnier than that old gag about the rubber crutch. I was especially enchanted by the gang of vampire royalty known as The Volturi, who are capable of killing Edward. They come and go (in and out of out of Italy) wearing cardinal red frocks straight out of the Inquisition and exhibit a simpering wit, especially when the special effects call for a crevasse to appear in an old temple tile floor, that looked as though it was manufactured from some discount tiles at a Hollywood branch of Tile City.
In this the third flick (“Eclipse”) Seattle is ravaged by a string of mysterious killings and Victoria, a very malicious vampire, continues her quest for revenge, so Bella and Edward and their friends find themselves up against an army of newborn vampires, capable of killing anything that moves. They join up with the wolf pack and prepare for supernatural war. While the vampires and the wolves line up on their side of the battlefield Edward, Bella and Jacob camp up in the mountains, so Bella is protected from harm.
Up to this point I kept from nodding off because as bad as the second movie was, it was never as off-putting as this, the third. Even Leo Gorcey in the “Bowery Boys Meet Dracula” had a hint of life.
Then came the big battle as Victoria tracks Edward’s scent to Bella’s forest hiding place, and Edward is forced to fight. Edward manages to cut off Victoria’s head, thus her vampire army is destroyed.
I stirred because this time around after the battle I sat through enough of movie three to see the bungalow colony of the Wolf-Folks and the up-scale homes of the Vampires. The Vampire decorating themes include modern art (the Wolves have motorcycle and chain saw calendars), great oriental rugs (the Wolf-Folks have discount tiles), designer furniture (the Wolf-Folks have camp chairs and card tables), and while the Vamps have up-market kitchens with stainless-steel fridges (apparently to store wine), the Wolf-Folks have old uprights without icemakers).
So here we are: Like everything else in today’s America, it turns out to be The Blues versus The Reds.
I can’t wait for the fourth installment and find out if the Tea-Party wins when up against the Ruling Elite or if they all join forces and start developing upscale condos in San Francisco.