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"American Pie"



Home / Film Reviews / "American Pie"

"American Pie"


Director: Chris Weitz, Paul Weitz
Actors: Chris Owen, Thomas DeLonge, Mark Hoppus, Natasha Lyonne, Tara Reid
Rating: Itís amazing how little it takes to get a laugh these days. If you donít believe it, sit through "American Pie," the new Hollywood salute to low humor in low places. Weíve recently been treated to an older man and a child urinating on somebodyís building or unmentionable things being done to male body equipment or lots of laughs over jokes revolving around laxatives but itís all carried to sublime heights in this teeny-bopper sex farce (itís rated R but in my audience there were seven kids under 16 lapping it up) as we watch one of the four heroes do sexual things with a warm apple pie. Itís something that Mrs. Paul never even dreamed of.

Come along with me and meet a beautiful exchange student who does an improbable striptease on the internet (due to a mistake in programming that even one of todayís kindergartners wouldnít make) or attend a party where one of our young heroes makes out with another kidís mother (yes, she has Lee Press-on Nails) on top of a pool table while a wild graduation party goes on. Watch young Oz, the handsome clumsy jock (and I must admit, well-acted by the always good Chris Klein), play high school lacrosse and lament his coming graduation because where will he go to play his favorite game. Or if that doesnít tear at your heartstrings, join everybody in the "loo" and talk about what youíve missed! One really wonders what kids who see this kind of drivel think the real world is all about? And you also wonder just what the young girls of today think about all this male manhandling?

There is one bright and imaginative moment and that revolves around a communal diary of sorts, where select members of the senior class record their sexual adventures--and their conquests--keeping the book hidden in the recesses of the school library. This is no kiddy Kama-Sutra but an often-amusing retelling of the heights of teenage passions. Boy, what an idea for a movie, but the producers here devote ten minutes of screen time to this prop and weíre back getting ready for the Senior Prom and whoís doing what to whom.

"American Pie" tries to be a cherry tart but winds up being a stale donut, served up on a dirty plate.